711 (2006)

I walked into 7-11 this morning and this woman all most ran me down before I stopped and checked her for her manners. She grunted like a four legged animal and went around me, and I made my way to the coffee pots and poured myself a dose.

As I was mixing my creamer into my cup-o-joe, I hear this woman yelling at the woman behind the counter.

“Ya’ll need to open them damn coolers in the back!”

The woman obliged, and I watched them open all the beer cooler doors.

What’s funny is that they didn’t have the beer she wanted in the coolers so she had to settle for a larger version than her usual.

Yes I said usual. This woman is in there almost every day. Usually she just gets a Natural Ice tall can.

But today she had to go with the quart.

She filed in behind me in line and I said my usual greeting to the clerk there. She is holding in her laugh, as this woman starts screaming:

“Don’t touch my backpack, please don’t touch my backpack!!!!!!!!!!!”

I turn around and there is nobody behind her.

I laughed my ass off and walked out the door.

Maybe I shouldn’t have.

As I pull out of the parking lot, I see here rifling through her car apparently looking for the money for the extra 16 oz of beer that she got.

Now, I am no stranger to early morning drinking. I have been to a convenience store watching them open the coolers at 6 in the AM.

BUT…

I can remember clearly each one of those times. And could probably count them on both hands if not one.

Usually it was meant to tone down the night before so I can get to sleep.

Some of you that have ever been with me on an all-nighter, know what I am saying.

(I miss blowin up)

But anyways.

I had a funny morning.